Patient, Understanding, Tender

I wish I could hear how my words sound before I say them.

I wish there were a recall button that I could press that would pull those words back out of their memories, their minds, the air.

Sometimes I wish others could hear  how they sound.  I know they don’t mean to be harsh.   I know in my heart they don’t really want to be mean and rough and insensitive.

I wish I could go back and whisper in my own ear, “be patient, be understanding, be tender.”

I can’t do any of that but I can tell myself today,
 “Be patient - it will all be ok without you saying something that will sting.”
“Be understanding - they are probably doing the best they can and maybe struggling with problems you don’t know anything about.”
 *Be tender - after all, that’s how you’d want others to speak to you.”

We can be patient, understanding, and tender and still be firm.  We can still give clear direction.  We can still say no.

How can we get ourselves to a place where the tone of what we say is patient, understanding, tender?

Jesus pointed the way when he said, “A good man brings good things out of the good stored up in his heart, and an evil man brings evil things out of the evil stored up in his heart. For the mouth speaks what the heart is full of.”  (Luke 6:45)

Perhaps in our morning prayers we can adjust the setting of our heart and choose to be patient with those we’ll meet and those we love.   We can remind ourselves to be understanding because there’s a lot going on in the minds and hearts of the  little ones, the older ones, the cranky ones.  We can decide to be tender with others just as we would want them to be tender with us.