Choosing Humility

There is nothing nice about pride.

I’m not talking about the pride which is akin to gratefulness.  I’m proud of my children.  I’m proud of my college.  Those sorts of pride are different.

 I’m talking about the pride that thinks, “I’m better than everybody else.”   That’s the dangerous kind of pride and from what I can tell, we all carry that with us like an invisible virus that’s just waiting to flare up.

A few weeks ago as I was preaching through I Peter, we came to I Peter 5:5 ‘In the same way, you who are younger, submit yourselves to your elders. All of you, clothe yourselves with humility toward one another, because,  “God opposes the proud but shows favor to the humble.”

I love the picture of every morning, consciously choosing to put on humility.  Just as I select a shirt out of the closet, I can also choose the attitudes of my heart.

Paul seems to be saying that having humility is not automatic for any of us.  We have to reject the pride option and come out clearly on the side of humility every day.   It seemed to me that it would be helpful then to think about what the two attitudes look like.   I came up with this list which is helpful to me and may be to you.  I doubt it’s complete but it’s a start toward thinking about the issue.

1. Pride is bossy and controlling.  Humility is easygoing and sees leadership as service.
     
2.  Pride wants to be sure and get the credit, humility is content to have served.
   
3.  Pride is harsh and demanding.  Humility is gentle and understanding.
   
4. Pride doesn’t think about the feelings of others in the conversation or in the moment.   Humility is tender and empathetic.

5. Pride can be rigid and unbending. Humility is flexible and can adjust.

6. Pride is sinfully independent. Humility is gracefully interdependent.
    Pride would rather die than ask for help.
   The humble values the help of others and easily, comfortably acknowledges their need for help.

7.  The proud person is frustrated with the imperfections and weaknesses of others.  The humble soul is patient and accepting.

8.   Pride has to be heard NOW or else. Humility can wait.

9.    Pride hates to apologize. Humility is eager to set things right.
       Pride will defend, justify, ignore what happened, hide from responsibility and resist any suggestion of fault.  Humility will find no problem in recognizing that they can be wrong.

10.  Pride feels entitled. Humility is grateful.

11.  Pride hates correction and the suggestion there might be something lacking. Humility welcomes it because it is fully aware that there is room to grow.

12. Pride secretly thinks “I’m better.” Humility knows, “I’m not special.”

13.  Pride wants (needs?) to be better than...   Humility is content to do well.

 14. Pride automatically loves its own ideas best.  Humility welcomes everyone’s input
   Pride really wishes everybody would just keep their thoughts to themselves...because, why bother...”haven’t I spoken?”
   Humility honestly, welcomes everyone’s input and questions and thoughts:

15.  Pride makes others feel small.  Humility helps others feel significant and valued.

16. Pride is closed to instruction.     Humility is eager to learn.

17. Pride is mortified when mistakes are made or weakness exposed.  Humility is not shocked or embarrassed,  but ready to correct, learn, and improve.

This is a list I need to read often.  I hope it’s helpful for you as well.

Four Reasons For The Gospel Study Guide.

1.  Children aren’t born knowing the Gospel.

    There is nothing automatic about the process of a person coming to understand and believe.

     Teaching and learning have to happen.  Your child’s sport team has scheduled practices. They set a time and place and begin to learn the basics.  You may have already said, “let’s go to the backyard.  I'll show you how to kick a ball or swing a bat.”   In the same way, you can set a time and place and begin to teach your child the lessons of faith that can lead them to their own relationship with God.
 

2.  You need a plan and a tool that will work TODAY.

    You are busy, busy.  You don’t have time to create a plan or invent and build a tool. You need something that’s ready to go, straight out of the box.   Once the Gospel Study Guide and a Bible are in your hands, there is no preparation necessary.  Find Session One and start.  It’s really that simple.

3.   Understanding builds over time.

    Very, very few of us “get it” the first time we are shown anything.

   We need multiple exposures to an idea.  We need to hear it and then hear it again.  Repetition and review are built into the Gospel Study Guide.  Over time, understanding deepens.

4.    The Word of God is powerful. 

      The Holy Spirit has always used the Word to bring about saving faith.   “Consequently, faith comes from hearing the message, and the message is heard through the word about Christ.”  Romans 10:17     The Gospel Study Guide leads your children and teens into Scriptures that teach the big truths about our sin, God’s grace, and the work of Jesus.

Want to know more?

Email me at clark956@hotmail.com.  Or, if you are local, come this Sunday, Sept. 25 at 6:00 PM to Faith Baptist in Tioga.   You can see the Guide for yourself.  I'll spend out about 45 minutes explaining the process, walking you through the Guide, and answering questions.

The response of so many to the news I shared about The Gospel Study Guide (GSG) has been very encouraging!  Thanks everyone.

I thought I would mention a few things about this new resource so here are five things I want you to know.


1.    This is 100% a PRE-conversion tool to help students come to really understand what the Bible teaches about our sin, the work of Jesus, God’s grace, and faith.   As a pastor, I am often approached by children and youth who want to be baptized.  I want to be sure that they have deeply understood the Gospel and said a whole-hearted “YES” to it before they are baptized.  Those of us in Baptist and other like-minded churches hear this story often: “I was baptized when I was 6 or 7 or 8 but I really didn’t know what I was doing.  It was later that my faith became real.”    It seems to me that we can prevent those kinds of confusing experiences with better teaching.  I couldn't find a resource that addressed this need so over the last few years I've been developing one.  Now, here it is.

2.   This resource can be used by anybody - student, parent, church leader, in any setting.   The GSG takes the user through the Scriptures and the key concepts of the Gospel.  There are answer pages in the back so you can check your responses.  You don’t have to be an expert or a professional.  You can do this!

3.   There are several pages of instructions and guidance for the students who will use the GSG and for the parents or other adults leading sessions.   If you choose to use the GSG, I strongly encourage you to read these pages.

4.    This is the kind of study that a pre-teen or youth can work through more than once.  In fact, the more times they walk through it the better!   Some who have genuinely said “yes” to the Gospel will benefit from gaining a clearer, sharper understanding of what they did when they trusted Jesus to be their Savior.

5.   We all want our children and teenagers to experience this wonderful thing we call being saved.  But wishful thinking is not enough.   The Holy Spirit doesn’t use  vague hints or indirect pressure.   The Spirit uses the Gospel to convict and create faith.    The guide provides a structure for a sustained exposure to the Gospel facts.  This is a long look at what this thing called the Gospel is all about.  This is a tool to help the child deeply engage with the Gospel.  

     If you are looking for something that is quick and easy...this is not for you.   This for the parent or pastor who wants to bring an older student through a sustained interaction with Bible passages that teach Gospel basics.  This allows the child to discover the Gospel for him or herself.  It requires their mental engagement with the hope that it will lead to heart engagement.
   This will require a serious commitment of time but this is, after all, a serious issue.

Copies are available for $10 plus $2 for postage costs.   Email me at clark956@hotmail.com.   If you find this resource helpful, I hope you’ll tell other parents and/or church leaders about it.

Thanks!
Clark Palmer

Walking In Our Forgiveness

Let’s talk about being chronically miserable because of the sinful/dumb/foolish things we did in the past. 

Let’s talk about that inner voice that says, “You can’t worship, pray, serve, because of that thing or those things.”  Or, “You shouldn’t even mix with those other, ‘decent’ people.”   

You hear those voices and sharp-edged feelings of guilt and shame explode inside you.  

I suspect that all of us have some experience with guilt and shame.   We’ve all behaved in ways that fell short of what God intended and short of what others expected and needed.   For some, the past may seem littered with a thousand small instances of failure.  The memory of those multiple mistakes is ever present, stealing the joy from today.   For others, the present is haunted by that one big failure in the past that still clouds every day. 

On the one hand, those of us who are believers would affirm our belief that when Jesus died on the cross, it was for our sins.  We believe what we sing... “Jesus Paid It All.”   But the truth is we don’t always feel it.   We aren’t walking in the forgiveness that was granted us when we put our faith in Jesus.

So we carry extra baggage with us through each day.   Guilt.  Shame.  Fear.  Sadness.  Emptiness.  Hopelessness.  Like a low grade fever these drag us down.

   

Events....trigger memories that trigger shame.  Opportunities....excite you but then you remember... ”Oh wait, I’m not fit.  I’m not worthy.   I can’t serve.  I can’t attend.  I can’t pray.  I can’t speak up.  Who am I to get involved?”

  

We aren’t walking in our forgiveness.   

Walking in your forgiveness means that each day you actively remember what the Bible says about the sins of your past.   

Proverbs 28:13 “Whoever conceals their sins does not prosper, but the one who confesses and renounces them finds mercy."

All of Psalm 32, but especially verse 5, “Then I acknowledged my sin to you and did not cover up my iniquity.    I said, “I will confess my transgressions to the Lord.”  And you forgave the guilt of my sin.”

All of Psalm 103, and best of all verses 11-12, “For as high as the heavens are above the earth,  so great is his love for those who fear him;  as far as the east is from the west,  so far has he removed our transgressions from us."

I John 1:9 “If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness.”

How will you greet the new day with joy again?   By walking in your forgiveness

How will you be real again?  By believing what God says about your sin

How will you serve again?   By fully owning the fresh start God gives to those who confess. 

How will you worship and pray again?  By knowing you stand fully accepted before God because Jesus took your sin with him to the cross. 

You have to walk in your forgiveness. 

Shut down the relentless attack by your memories.  

Healing of the memories comes as you stand up to that part of your mind that puts the record of your past sin on "repeat" so that it plays over and over. 
Sternly, firmly tell that accusing memory to be silent.
Subdue the voice that whispers ''condemned."

It speaks lies.

When those thoughts say, “You are worthless and unacceptable,” you can forcefully respond with the truth:  “That’s not what the Word says.  The Word says I’m a cherished, beloved child of my heavenly Father."

Live in  joy.   Approach God in prayer.  Say yes to the chance to serve.  Take your place among the believers for worship.   Pull up a chair and take part in fellowship with the rest of the forgiven sinners.

Walk in your forgiveness. 

The Gift of Encouragement

I read a story yesterday that reminded me that words are powerful.   Larry Crabb tells of a man who struggled for years with a drinking problem and depression.   In the course of his counseling interviews, this story emerged.  His father started a business which grew to be a large corporation.  Repeatedly, this man told him, “Son, when you inherit the family business, I expect that you will ruin it.”  

You can imagine the stinging pain and discouraging impact of those words.  After his father died, the man was driven to prove his father wrong.  The pressure to keep that prediction from coming true pushed him to work long hours.  He found that alcohol was a temporary relief from the terrible fear of failure.  Eventually he fell into a dark hole of depression. 

Certainly the story is a warning about negative, discouraging words.    But I tell the story to make this point - positive, encouraging words are just as powerful.  

It is within your power today to give the gift of encouragement to the people in your world.  And it won’t cost a dime or take up much of your time or effort.   

Everyone you meet today is struggling in some area of their life.   Everyone.   

In some corner of their world they are insecure or uncertain.   Most of them are weary from the struggle.  Some of them have forgotten that their lives and efforts matter.   They have the feeling they are toiling on alone, in the dark, with no end in sight.

A long time ago, there was a group of Jesus followers who were drifting away from their faith.  Surrounded by an environment that was hostile to their faith, they were on the verge of giving up.  The advice that came to them was this:

  “And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds,  not giving up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but encouraging one another—and all the more as you see the Day approaching.”   Hebrews 10:24-25

Today you will walk by people who are carrying some heavy stuff in their lives.  Some of those you will speak to today think their lives don’t matter.  Others are discouraged by their circumstances.   

What if we decided that today, we would target the people around us with some encouraging words?   There’s something to appreciate about everyone.  What if you gave voice to that today?

  

“Hey, thanks for being here.   You are such a helpful person.”    

“We couldn’t do this without you.  Thanks so much.”

“I know things aren’t easy for you right now but I admire you for hanging in there.”

“About that job yesterday....well done.”

“Don’t give up.  I believe in you.”  

I’m going to try to be more intentional about being encouraging today.   I hope you will too.  One sentence at a time we can do some good.

1 Encouragment, The Key To Caring.  Larry Crabb, Dan Allender. Zondervan Publishing House, 1984. 

Patient, Understanding, Tender

I wish I could hear how my words sound before I say them.

I wish there were a recall button that I could press that would pull those words back out of their memories, their minds, the air.

Sometimes I wish others could hear  how they sound.  I know they don’t mean to be harsh.   I know in my heart they don’t really want to be mean and rough and insensitive.

I wish I could go back and whisper in my own ear, “be patient, be understanding, be tender.”

I can’t do any of that but I can tell myself today,
 “Be patient - it will all be ok without you saying something that will sting.”
“Be understanding - they are probably doing the best they can and maybe struggling with problems you don’t know anything about.”
 *Be tender - after all, that’s how you’d want others to speak to you.”

We can be patient, understanding, and tender and still be firm.  We can still give clear direction.  We can still say no.

How can we get ourselves to a place where the tone of what we say is patient, understanding, tender?

Jesus pointed the way when he said, “A good man brings good things out of the good stored up in his heart, and an evil man brings evil things out of the evil stored up in his heart. For the mouth speaks what the heart is full of.”  (Luke 6:45)

Perhaps in our morning prayers we can adjust the setting of our heart and choose to be patient with those we’ll meet and those we love.   We can remind ourselves to be understanding because there’s a lot going on in the minds and hearts of the  little ones, the older ones, the cranky ones.  We can decide to be tender with others just as we would want them to be tender with us.